My Child is NOT a Genius


My Child is not a GENIUS. My child isn’t gifted he is NORMAL. Announcing this concept gets me into trouble. A while ago I went for a coffee with another Mother and sat there listening to her explain to me how her child smiled at 3 weeks. Now I’m trying not to be judgmental but honey that was gas. My bundle of joy finally produced a gummy grin at the bog standard 7 week mark. Now just because he didn’t come out my vagina smiling it didn’t make it less of an awe inspiring moment. But Mothers you need to stop. It makes the rest of us feel somewhat inadequate.

My child sat at 5.5 months. Yup ladies and gents that’s bang smack where he should be. Yes I could have claimed 4 months. Propped up with pillows and hanging on precariously with his head slightly lulling, I could say at 4 month he sat. This in turn will freak out the next mother.

Milestone mania is a real thing. I’m a sane normal person. Add in another mothers innocent question of ‘has he rolled yet’ and suddenly I am googling at 3am if my child will ever move.

Deep down I know my other friend’s bundle of joy will win the milestone race irrespective of mine. But deeper down I keep hoping my little one will beat hers even if it is picking his nose first.



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